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what would you change about yourself?

First of all, if you've ever been asked that question, I'd love to know how you answered. I can tell you the same answer that I always say: I take things too personally.

So what, right? Well, it's inconvenient. I take everything personally, EVERYTHING. You didn't respond to my text message because you were busy? Even if I know that, I'll probably still take it personally. You got busy and forgot we had a group project meeting? You probably don't want to work in my group, and I'll take that personally. You "subtweet" about how you never want to see someone again? OMG THAT'S ABOUT ME TOO, I'm definitely taking that personally.

I don't really think it's a self centered behavior, just that I. TAKE. EVERYTHING. PERSONALLY. Everything. Even if it's a joke, it will probably still hurt my feelings.

The worst part about all of that? Even though I know that I'm doing it, but I can't stop!

Let me give an example that most girls will probably relate to. Last night, PMSing, and I want Red Mango. We arrive at Red Mango, and there isn't anywhere to park (which shouldn't have been a surprise, considering that it's always full in that parking lot)... I realize this, and knew coming into the situation that we probably would need to park somewhere else, but what do I do? I drive around looking for a spot, ASSUMING that everybody sees me circling and is purposely not giving up their spot. As I'm doing this, I'm ranting aloud to the poor boyfriend, who is unfortunately (for his sake) in the car with me. Ranting and raving about how annoying this is, how I hate everybody in the parking lot, and how if I seriously DON'T GET MY FROYO-RIGHT-THIS-SECOND-I-AM-GOING-TO-LOSE-IT. Yep, I got louder and then started speaking in strings of words.

As this is happening, I KNOW THAT I'M BEING CRAZY! In my mind, I'm actually thinking (along with how I hate everybody parked here right now) that I'm losing my mind over froyo, and I should really calm down. But did I? No. Because I knew it was absolutely personal that these people were parked here at this exact time.

Crazy, right?

I'd love to say this is something I'm working and improving on, but I think I've always been like this. Another example? All of my friends are invited somewhere. I take it personally that I'm not invited. They give the standard "you're always invited anywhere we go!".... No, if you wanted me there, you would've specifically invited me. Again, crazy, but that's just how my mind works.

[I won't blame anyone who wants to unfollow now!]

my angel.

Those of you who have been in the position of losing a friend know what I mean when I say it's SO difficult to talk about. In fact, I won't even share my story here, because it's not about me or my experience. It was hard, it's still hard, and that's the best way I can explain it.

Kirsten Ashleigh Johnston was born on January 1, 1990 and passed away on December 17, 2006. She was always happy, but was SO CUTE when she was mad. Kir was a little girl, so small, so her being mad was just funny for the most part. There are so many great things that I could say about her, but really, how do you get to know someone that you never met anyway? I cherish my memories with her, and I think that's enough without sharing them.

After Kir's death, a lot of us weren't happy with things that were written about her. Her obituary was fine... nothing special, but nothing that made anyone upset either. Then, there was an article claiming that Kir wasn't wearing her seatbelt, and making her death into what I would basically call an example for other teens (sorry, can't find that one in the archives online). That, quite frankly, pissed us all off. The point was for them to do an article about Kir, not make Kir an example. It was annoying, and after several emails, we convinced them to let one of us write something in remembrance. It ended up being me to do so, and I was extremely overwhelmed but proud that I was the one given the opportunity. Again, I can't find it in the archives online, but it was a thoughtful article, and I thought it made us all happy to see a remembrance, not an example-making headline.

I also spoke about Kirsten and showed a video at our baccalaureate ceremony.

Yesterday, I took a trip to visit Kir, and take her a little something (as I normally do when I visit). This time it was a little more difficult than in the past because I didn't have something at home that I wanted to take with me. My most recent trip, I took her a red ribbon. I have several hair ribbons of her's, one that stays in my car hanging in the mirror (my car guardian angel, superstitious, i know), and one that we keep tied to our frige, plus several more just around the house. This time, since I didn't have something in mind I decided I wanted something matching; one to leave for her and one to take home with me. I had a very specific string bracelet in mind, but unfortunately the kiosk that was selling them is no longer in the mall. :( So, second best choice, we found a cute BFF necklace that's a heart and an angel wing, which I thought fit perfectly.

The full area with all of Kir's ducks, cross, and nameplate. I was glad to see my ribbon hadn't gotten torn to shreds in all this bad weather recently. Also, we got lucky because it had been soo dark and gloomy the whole way there, we were happy to see the sun.

The ducks and her nameplate. I'll be back within the next month, so my plan is to take some cleaning supplies and get all the dirt off everything!

Just the nameplate.

A reallyyy good photo for all the wind there was and the fact I was using my BlackBerry. This is what I brought Kir last time (the ribbon) and this time (the necklace). The necklace is perfect, a broken heart and angel wing. I'm wearing the other half.

Bad wind, but with Kir and our necklaces. I'm also wearing her shirt. :)

Not sure what the pink line is, but it was really pretty as we drove away. It got sunny when we arrived, which was really nice since it was pretty gloomy most of the drive, but it got really nice with the light coming down on the way home. 

the..... junior 15?

First of all, let me preface this by saying I'm in no means "fat", as some girls like to call themselves. I'm just past what is considered a "healthy" weight for my height and body type, and since I'm a girl, it's really been getting to me lately! So I'm asking all of you for some suggestions...

I'm not kidding when I say I eat a horrible diet. What I mean by horrible diet is my boyfriend and I eat out 3 times a day. Sometimes less, but suffice it to say our main meals are served via drive-through. I decided to try My Fitness Pal after seeing so many recommendations for it, and WOW, that was crazy. I am not very knowledgable on what is in the food I eat, and I've NEVER been a calorie counter, so to have it laid out in front of me was crazy. My daily intake? Somewhere in the area of 3,500 calories. Not really anything healthy, either. I only drink water (with an occasional Starbucks tea), but that doesn't help with dieting when you're consuming almost triple the calories of what is recommended for you.

So I'm asking all of you - do you have any suggestions for things that are easy and HEALTHY to cook? I've definitely found some great blogs online with suggestions, but I'm a VERY picky eater so it's a difficult thing for me to find something not only easy enough to cook, but that is also healthy. Also, since I'm a college student, I really need to find snacks that I can take out with me during the day.

On the flipside, I know one of the best ways to lose weight is consistent exercise, but I find this challenging as well! By the time I've gotten home from a full day of classes and work, I just don't want to workout. I was doing pretty well with the 30 Day Shred, but I have let that slide also.

So, any suggestions for me!?

"wait... i forgot my phone."

This morning I forgot my BlackBerry. I understand that I'm not a business person or someone that needs to be communicated with 24/7. I also understand that I only had class until 12:30 this afternoon, so the chances were anyone who needed to get in touch with me could probably wait until then and it wouldn't be a big deal. I, on the other hand, had tears in my eyes when I looked at Philip (the boyfriend) and told him I had forgotten my phone. Yes, REAL TEARS. Over a BlackBerry.

Let me chronicle how many years I've had a BlackBerry permanently attached to my hand...

So... I couldn't even get the image off of the BlackBerry website, that's how old this phone is. It's a BlackBerry 6510, for anyone who's curious. I got this my junior year of highschool... On Nextel... There was a huge antenna, no color on the screen, and my friends called it "the boat" because it was so big. NOT. KIDDING.

Finally, my mom saw the light towards the end of my senior year, and switched us to Verizon. FINALLY! My brother and I hated Nextel, and wanted to be on Verizon like all of our friends. I got this gem, a nice phone but no camera. NO CAMERA? WHAT WAS I GOING TO DO WITH NO CAMERA!? And then came college.

BlackBerry is the phone on IU's campus. Everybody has one, in some version or another, and at the time, this BlackBerry Curve 8330 was new. AND SO PRETTY. It had a camera, pretty much my only requirement at that point. I immediately purchased one off ebay (without even asking to make sure I could activate it, thankfully I've learned since then) and this is probably one of my favorite phones I've ever had. I loved it and still have it to this day, because sometimes I like to switch back just for fun. This thing might be slow and old looking now, but it was a workhorse for the entire time I had it. True love.

I got this phone mere days after it's release. By that point, I was truly addicted to my Crackberry, and I absolutely had to have it. It's the more updated version of things that they were putting out at the time, and it was nice but nothing special.

This is the current Bold 9650. This was the rebrand into the bold line, and the only thing that really changed from my last phone was getting the trackpad, something I was avidly against........ until the phone came out and IHADTOHAVEITNOWPLEASEMOMPLEASE! Yep, that dramatic.

So that gives you a good idea of how long I've had a BlackBerry with me 24/7 and I've definitely come to depend on it for EVERYTHING. Well, almost everything, I still write things in a planner rather than putting them in my phone. I'm on BBM and Twitter all the time, and I love that I get emails immediately. I use this phone enough that the paint is wearing off of multiple keys...

I'm sure some of you are thinking why not something like an iPhone or Android, but as you can see I'm all about the BlackBerry. And all about the physical keyboard that it offers.... I spend a lot of time on my phone and trying to learn to use a touchscreen just isn't something I'm interested in!

So what do you guys use? Why? Anything you're super loyal to and won't ever give up?

so, here we are again...

And I'm writing another over-enthusiastic welcome post.

I've been an avid blog reader for a few months now, since right after discovering WeddingBee and becoming obsessed with following it each and every day. (By the way, for any brides out there that are looking for wedding blogs, ideas, and inspiration, I would recommend WeddingBee over any other place! The community is so welcoming and friendly, they update frequently, and you can actually speak to the ladies that are writing about their weddings!) Anyway, I love WeddingBee, in case that wasn't obvious enough.

Eventually, an artsy friend of mine (no, seriously, her work is amazing! Go look now!) sent me her blog list, and said that her google reader was full... Google reader? What's that? Ever since, I've been obsessively searching for new blogs to follow (and have managed to add over 80 to my Google reader, thanks to the share your blog section on WeddingBee).

I even started my own to blog about my event planning internship this summer. Then I kept finding great ideas or things I wanted to try on other blogs, and realized I needed a personal one too.

That story was way too long winded and had a ton of WeddingBee references, but you get the idea... I fell in love with blogs!

So more about me... I'm a 21 year old junior at Indiana University in Bloomington, Indiana. I created my own major (yep, from scratch) that I named Event Planning and Programming. I minor in business (through the famous Kelley School) and sociology. My internship is also being done here in Bloomington, but I'll go ahead and shamelessly plug point you again in the direction of my internship blog if you want to know more about that!

I have an amazing family, located 80-something miles North of Bloomington, and a perfect, precious best friend located almost 300 miles away in Chicago. My little furbaby (an extremely fluffy tabby named Melman Chester) and boyfriend both reside with me here in Bloomington.

I can't wait to share all the fantastic ideas I've found already, and hopefully to try some of them myself!

Happy reading! And let me know if you have your own blog that I might want to check out!